# 10 - In Entirety

Title: In Entirety.
Author: Bri (acquisition).
Pairing: Roy Mustang/Edward Elric.
Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist.
Theme: # 10 – 10
Disclaimer: Neither the characters nor the show belong to me, sadly; otherwise, there would be quite a few changes... >.> Sigh, my life.

It had been ten weeks since Edward left. Ten weeks. Seventy days, two and a half months, 1680 hours and some minutes, not that anyone's been counting. But it had been ten weeks since Edward and Alphonse left Central, years of research packed away in suitcases and notebooks they both carried. Nineteen-year-old Edward had finally gathered all the materials he needed now, all the knowledge and all the power he had to have to reach his main goal: he was going to restore Al. No longer would his younger brother be confined to that tin-can of a suit of armor, no; he would have his real body, could conceive real human feelings, could be complete again.

But it had been ten weeks since Edward had set out to do this, and Roy was beginning to wonder if they would ever come back to Central after all. Had it in his head that maybe, once Ed restored Al to his original state, that they would go back home and remain there. Roy wouldn't blame either of them, really – Ed didn't enjoy being a dog of the military, and Al would certainly prefer to be home again, and with Winry, most likely.

The eleventh week came and went, and Roy received a letter in the mail. It was from Edward – which meant there were no frills, no fancy words and no i's dotted with stars as he confessed his heart's deepest secrets. On the other end of the scale, there were no wantonly explicit fantasies scrawled across the page and there were no dirty pictures jammed down into the envelope. It was simple, and to the point, and it was one of the many things Roy adored about Edward; he didn't need fancy explanations. He told, clearly, and that was that.

Roy-

I'm mailing this just before leaving. By the time you receive it, I'm assuming it's going to be Wednesday-

Roy looked at the calendar – Wednesday. Edward was impeccable with this.

Our train arrives Thursday afternoon. Come get us; I have a surprise for you.

-Edward.

PS – I might miss you.

Roy simply smiled to himself and asked Hawkeye to arrange for a car to take him to the train station the next afternoon.

---

It was mid-August, and unseasonably hot for Central during that particular time of year. August was hot, yes, but not like this. Roy, Hawkeye, and Havoc all sat lined up on a bench at the train station, arms crossed as they waited, staring at various points and making small talk to pass the time. All had forfeited their typical military uniforms that day in favor of cooler clothing – t-shirts, thinner pants, a skirt in one's case – and all were thankful they'd done it. Had they not, they would have all died of heatstroke by now.

Roy checked his watch. They'd been sitting out here close to three hours now, waiting. Another train had come about an hour prior and they'd thought it was Edward and Alphonse's, but it had obviously turned out to be from some other town, some other area and at the false alarm, they'd all taken their places on the bench again.

"They take too damn long."

Two sets of eyes turned to look at Havoc, both with warning glares locked into place as to prevent further elaboration. Riza didn't have that gun of hers, but Roy most certainly had his gloves tucked into some back pocket, and that in itself was enough of a reason for him to shut up.

"...Train personnel and such, I mean."

If train personnel were so inadequate, then, why did they all hear a train? This time, three sets of eyes shot straight for the direction they'd heard the approaching train coming from, squinting if necessary, until their eyes had a distinct picture of it. This would be it – had to be it, because they'd been waiting so long now, so long and it was so hot and they couldn't stand it anymore.

A few more minutes' wait and they were standing again, going toward the halted train as random other people began pouring out of it. Search the crowd, keep looking – there. This really was the right train, and within the next hour they would be out of here and away from this damned heat.

Edward stepped down off the train calmly, eyes hidden behind a curtain of blonde bangs and the glasses he wore. Roy wondered how in the hell he could manage to keep his jacket on in this heat, but that was insignificant and unimportant now. He looked tired, amazingly worn and maybe even somewhat thinner than he'd been before he left – his hair looked dull, and the yawn that came was all telling. He'd worked himself to death, had poured all of his being into this project, and... he'd succeeded. That much was clear once he held his hand back into the train to help the somewhat taller boy off.

Alphonse.

Edward smiled when he saw him, as human, and Al grinned. He had short, darker hair and brown eyes, had a fuller face and was taller than his brother – not that it surprised anyone, but all observations were open to be made. His face was less worn, had a simple quality encompassing it and it had an almost-innocent quality to it that Edward's face had long since lost. It was refreshing to see him like this; almost relieving, because it was Edward, only not, and it was years of pain and tears and work poured into the creation of this carefully crafted body that Edward had taken weeks to build after years of learning how.

Alphonse was still unsteady on his feet, unadjusted to being so light now in comparison to the steel body he'd once claimed as his own and so Edward helped him, gave him his right hand to hold on to and took their suitcase with his left, leading his brother through the crowd as he looked around for the welcoming party he knew would be there.

Havoc was the first to say something.

"Over here, boss!" He waved the two Elric brothers over and Edward shook his head with a smile, ponytail swaying somewhat as he made their way over to the three he'd seen. Alphonse seemed only somewhat nervous as he was pulled along and then placed in front Roy, Hawkeye, and Havoc, giving a somewhat sheepish smile. It was strange, he noticed, being in front of them with his human body for the first time. He knew them and yet his body didn't, had never met them and he'd never seen them with human eyes, had never been so capable of reaching out and touching them before, had never been eye level with any of them and able to smile and show some sort of emotion other than straight-faced armor.

"Hi," he said softly, aware of the hand that was pressed to his lower back and taking comfort in the fact that he had Edward with him just in case something went wrong in this situation. Riza was the first to reach out to him and she touched his hair, smiling at him.

"Welcome back, Alphonse."

What had been an awkward smile on Alphonse's part turned full and unwavering, genuinely happy to be here again and in the company of people he considered friends. His brother was wonderful company, was amazing, had done so much for him and he had so much to see now with these new eyes, so much to feel, to experience... and god, did he ever owe Edward for it. He'd still be paying back his debt fifty years from now, and really, he doubted he'd ever be able to show how immensely thankful he was. This was everything he'd dreamed about for so long, had longed for and missed and wished for, had nearly lost forever, and now it was within his grasp again.

They left soon afterward, Alphonse chattering away to Havoc and Hawkeye about various things he'd seen on their trip and the way things felt, about cloth and water and heat and whatever else he'd touched over their weeks away since his soul had been rebound to the new body his brother had created for him. Edward, however, kept silent, simply giving a small smile every so often at some random mention he'd caught his brother in the midst of as he walked alongside Roy. The fingers of his left hand had covertly slid into the older man's pocket and had taken residence there, thankful beyond belief that he was home again and close again and soon, so soon, they would be out of the public eye. After all, the 'I might miss you' of his letter had clearly meant 'I'm going insane without you' in Edward terms.

Once they'd all gotten in the car, Ed wasted no time in letting his head lay on Roy's shoulder and going to sleep. Truth be told, he hadn't slept much at all since leaving. He'd been spending late nights researching, working, building, piecing together... and being homesick. Not that he'd say it, but the fact remained that he had been, and he'd sleep better tonight than he had in months.

---

Ed woke up some hours later on their bed, glasses on the table next to him as he lazily looked around. It was so nice to be in a familiar setting again, back home, back with Roy and back to his own normal life. He turned over onto his stomach and stretched, gloved fingers grasping wooden bars of the headboard as he worked his muscles back into a semi-relaxed state, finally reaching out and grabbing the pillow Roy typically slept on to curl his right arm around. He yawned and buried his face in the fabric, breathing there a moment, taking in everything he'd missed for so long now, thinking of how many bumps in the road they'd hit over these past weeks and how many times he'd wanted to turn around and come home.

"Miss me?"

Edward's head shifted slightly at the interruption, though he didn't pull his face away from the pillow; he simply shrugged and murmured some kind of "hmm" as his response.

"I take that as a yes."

There was a dip in the bed beside him and he felt one of Roy's arms wrap around him, pulling him away from the pillow and bringing him closer. He could always blame current pliability on being half-asleep, and most likely would, come later; for now, however, he simply let Roy do what he wanted. Kisses fell across the back of his neck in splayed patterns, pausing finally as the older man nuzzled his nose into blonde hair. Eleven weeks was such an awfully long time, had been so unbearably empty and lonely. Both of them knew this. Both of them had missed and wanted, both had waited and counted as days went by on their calendars, watching as they peeled back sheet after sheet and marked off day after week after month. It was over now, though. It was finished, and Edward had done what he'd set out to do for so long, had finally done it.

"I'm proud of you, you know."

Edward snorted softly, shifting so his face wasn't pressed into the pillow anymore and his words wouldn't be muffled. Even with his sardonic reaction to Roy's comment, his left hand found Roy's fingers and tangled with them somewhat, lightly rubbing his palm, the underside of his fingers, whatever he could touch. He was quiet for a long while, watching, focusing, before he ever even spoke.

"I didn't sleep the first week."

Roy was silent at this, watching their hands absently as fingers touched, slid, locked into place. He didn't really know what to say. Edward didn't tell a lot of what went on inside him, wasn't the kind of person to go emotional or sappy or whatever else. He was careful with his words and what he revealed, and normally, he wouldn't have admitted to something like that because he knew that Roy would worry about him, even if the older man didn't actually say he was worried. What they had was unconventional in that they didn't keep things from each other – they just didn't say them unless asked. Roy knew how far he could get away with prying, and Ed knew his boundaries as well. It was this mutual respect that made them work and allowed them to be together even when both men were geared toward dominance and complete control.

"I wasn't sure I could do it," Ed continued after a short pause, his voice a little quieter and calmer than it typically was. Anyone that knew him knew he had the gift of gab and could easily talk someone's ear off about any and everything that came to his mind, had the ability to go a mile a minute without so much as a rest stop for those listening to him, and so it was rare to catch him in these quiet moods where he didn't really feel like talking but forced himself to do it anyway. "After I got everything ready, I wasn't sure I could do it. I was scared... that maybe I'd mess up, maybe I'd lose him completely and there wouldn't be anything I could do to get him back this time. The first three weeks.. I didn't do anything. I wouldn't, and he would ask me what was wrong and I'd blow him off. I didn't want to talk about it, because I was scared, and saying it out loud made it seem real."

"That's understandable, though, Ed. You thinking that seems normal for the situation you both were in."

"It took hours," Edward continued, unfaltering at Roy's words. Roy decided that maybe it would be best to stay quiet, to let Ed get all of this out on his own without words of encouragement or comfort until the end. “Hours turned into days, a week passed and I thought it would never be finished. I didn't want to do it, it was too hard and I wasn't ready and I wanted to come home because... because. Because it was going to kill me, and I wanted out, because I was going to ruin Al and me. I didn't know anything, I didn't know what I was doing because I couldn't remember any of what I'd read or wrote down to keep track of, and no matter how many times I read and reread everything I'd brought with me I couldn't keep it inside for more than five seconds. I couldn't make a human body. I tried a dozen times and it came out wrong, every damn time it was wrong and not human and... and if I couldn't get it right, he'd be trapped in it. In something that wasn’t human... and..."

He stopped again, calming himself, squeezing his eyes shut and trying his best not to cry. The past weeks had aged him ten years, had thrown the entire world on his shoulders and even now that it had rolled back off, it still pressed against him, threatening to take over all the time. He wondered if he should even continue, wondered if he could without shattering, but mentally, he felt he had to. Because Roy deserved to know.

"And I did it. I made the body. And after it was over I felt like I was breathing for the first time in ages, like my head had been held underwater and I hadn't been able to come up for so long. I could see again, and there was light, sunlight, everywhere, and he could see it and I could see him, him, and not some fucking iron armor. It was him. It was Al, and I cried for so long and he asked me what was wrong because he was afraid I'd messed up. But I showed him a mirror and he couldn't believe it, couldn't register the fact that he was human again and he cried with me because it was him. He could look in the mirror and see himself. We stayed in the same room for days.

"When he finally came out, Winry was there, and she'd been waiting for him. She was going to help him learn to do things again, teach him basic stuff, like eating and walking and how to not sit down so hard, because he was so used to being in that armor. I watched him go and it was amazing, but I couldn't bring myself out. Because I had something else to do, something else I had been working on and I knew it would make him happy, knew it would make me happy... and I know it was selfish, but I had to try. I couldn't keep on like that forever."

Ed let go of Roy's hand then, turning over to face him, look at him, really look. He had almost forgotten the light scarring on Roy's left eye, the exact shade of his skin and eyes, the way his hair seemed to fall and stretch toward his eyes but never quite seemed to reach when he was lying down. It was dark, darker than anything Edward had ever seen and he'd missed it so much.

"What did you do, Edward?"

And his voice. That wonderful, amazing voice that he was afraid he'd end up forgetting while he was away but never really could because he was constantly thinking about it, constantly playing back something that had already been said or done and he hadn't forgotten the way Roy's hands or lips or hair or skin felt, because they were all perfection, all combined into this one wonderful being.

Edward lifted his right hand, gloved fingers touching Roy's cheek lightly, carefully, in a brief swoop of cloth against skin and dark eyes widened, grabbed his hand and squeezed almost painfully before he'd had the chance to pull it away. Edward winced somewhat, staring at Roy in anticipation of a reaction he wasn't sure would be positive in this moment. The older man's other hand came and pulled off Edward's glove, tossing it away and staring at the wrist, the hand he had such a tight grip on.

Before Edward had gone, Roy wouldn't have been able to see Edward's skin turning white when he gripped like this, because Edward didn't have skin on his right arm. Now, however... now he did. It was soft, acquiescent, unworn and unmarked and all he could do was stare. Words failed him, because he didn't know what he was supposed to say or how Edward was expecting him to react.

"...My leg, too."

Roy's eyes looked back into Edward's then, gaze finally torn away from the wrist he held so tightly in his own palm, loosening his grip so circulation wouldn't be cut off. He hadn't expected this, and it seemed partially surreal, so different and yet... yet he found himself so relieved, oddly. So thankful, because he knew that both Al and Ed had gotten what they'd wanted for so long now, and this, this was like, well...

Edward felt warm, soft lips fall against the palm of his right hand, felt Roy's nose brush against the inside of his wrist and more kisses came to his fingertips, the side of his hand, the back and tight gripping once Roy's fingers came together with his again. They'd been together for years but this was the first time he'd ever held hands with Roy this way, the first time there were ten flesh fingers instead of five and the other man had him on his back, had already peeled off Edward's jacket and shirt and was trailing kisses along the inside of an arm that hadn't previously been there to touch. Others fell on his shoulder, on the juncture where arm met body and light touches made him laugh softly, tickled. Tickled, and he'd forgotten exactly what it felt like, but he wouldn't have dared let anyone remind him but Roy.

Roy kissed the center of his throat, dropped another against his stomach, let one hand linger there momentarily before pausing to unlace and throw off the younger man's boots, fingertips running along the bottoms of both of Ed's feet. This was definite, indescribable, and in their years together Edward had never once even thought of this. He'd never expected to feel Roy's touches on his right arm and left leg, had never thought about what kisses such as these on his right wrist or left foot's arch might feel like, could have never dreamed that he would feel sensation, tickling, hot, cold, here, there, fast, slow, incredible.

Everything was so different. Everything was stronger, magnified infinity times and though Ed's conscious being tried to put a grip on it, to contain it into a certain box, he couldn't force himself to do it. Because this was beyond anything he'd ever known, reached past previous outstanding boundaries and to feel, god, just to feel was something he'd taken for granted for so long that it brought stinging tears to his eyes.

No one else would understand. Anyone else who hadn't been right here, right in this exact position, would compare it to something stupid like a glass of lemonade on a summer day that you'd been craving for hours, or an itch you were finally able to scratch, or standing out in the cold for hours before finally going inside and letting yourself be completely surrounded by warmth and heat and comfort.

They were all wrong, though. All the comparisons would be wrong, because Ed and Roy were the only ones to understand. Because this was making love for the first time all over again, being so careful because you didn't really know what you were doing and you were inexperienced, learning that certain spots and light touches were something that nothing else in the world could compare to and it was like the first kiss, the one that mixed fire and ice and made the world stand still for a full thirty seconds. You never forget it. They would never forget it.

There were five fingers to dig into the older man's back and five more to tangle with Roy's own, two legs – both flesh – to wrap around his waist and hold him close, keep him in place. None of the other times counted anymore. None of the other kisses mattered as much as the ones that came that night, and no other time had Edward wanted to be so close, to cling so tightly, to just hold on with no sign of letting go. All sighs, gasps, and whispers meant a thousand times more than what was said, and gripping – just the simple act of tightening his fingers in Roy's as he was brought over the edge and crested into something beyond himself – made it all worth it.

Roy had never made love to Edward in entirety before. Not in the way he did that night. And words weren't needed for Roy to tell Edward that he loved him, that he was happy, so happy for him and so happy that he finally had what he wanted, so happy that he'd finally reached the goal he'd been trying for years to grasp. And Edward was a little older now, a little wiser to the ways of the world and Roy loved him all the more for it because he was genuine, real, complete.

Edward was whole. Roy couldn't stop staring, couldn't stop being amazed at all this boy had worked for and finally received. He couldn't hide how impressed he was, how proud he was, because that was his Edward and he'd done everything he'd set out to do. How many people could say that, after all? And this... this was beautiful. This was flawless and immaculate, perfect and indescribable, no matter how many times he went over it in his head. Smooth, pale flesh no longer met metal in any spot but instead curved into more flesh, more warmth and more life, more vitality and he wondered if he would ever come to a point where he wasn't absolutely taken aback at seeing Edward.

Roy didn't sleep that night. He couldn't get past the fact that there were two arms wrapped around him, two legs tangled in his own. No matter how tightly he held on or however many times he touched Edward's skin, this was something he'd never really experienced before. It was new, surprising; he hadn't been expecting it and yet he'd never known something so wonderful. He wouldn't take this for granted, wouldn't forget how astonishing it was and how quickly it had happened. Ten weeks was nothing compared to the lifetime after this.

He'd hold on to this for forever and never be tired of it, never get past this wonder. He would forever be in awe of it, of Edward, of his willpower and his ability to bring this about. Most of all, though, he would never tire of having two hands to hold on to, two legs to wrap around him when he picked Edward up or made love to him or sat him up on the island in the kitchen, two feet to plop in his lap when they were sprawled out on the couch doing nothing.

Ten fingers. Ten toes. Two new stretches of skin, a thousand new dips and curves he'd never met before. So much more he had to learn about, but he wouldn't rush through it. No; Roy would take forever in doing it.